[Video]

[whatwas]

[The PCD clacks and the view shakes a bit, but finally centers on Horst's happy face. He's up on a roof, with four bottles of liquor and a chair.]

Right, you bunch of nutters, I'm going to sit up here and watch you all run about.

Tyki, you want a drink? I'm up here in the sane corner of the world.

Comments

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

Then do you have the skills to permanently settle the living? But dead raising... do you still know the method to it? ...And I'm not immortal. If we're not killed by something, shinigami can live for a few thousand years, but we die eventually.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

Not yet. I've got a few theories. But...yes. It's not--I mean, it isn't something just anyone can do. I know how but that doesn't mean I can do it if that makes sense?

[He nods once, though.]

Well, if we don't figure it out before you die, I am immortal and I told him I'd stick around until he's dead. For whatever that's worth, which isn't much to him, but there we are.

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

It does. Having the knowledge doesn't mean being able to perform it. If you don't have the right tools, or an innate ability- some things are impossible.

[Glances sideways at him in silence for a few moments before adding.]

You could change your mind. That's eternity, Horst. Yuca doesn't have a choice; you could let a stray bit of sun hit you and be done with it.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

I could. But he doesn't have a choice--that's precisely why I won't.

[He purses his lips, thinking about changing the subject.]

I don't want to live forever either. I love Yuca [there, he can say it, he's been nagging at Kurotsuchi about honesty enough] but even if I didn't, I wouldn't condemn someone to eternity alone.

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

I doubt anyone who's experienced forever would want it.

[The mention of love didn't pull anything but a shrug from him; people said sentimental things like that all the time, it didn't mean anything.] And you say that, but have you seen what that's like? What eternity is like? Even if you think you have the option, when every bit of daylight is an accident waiting to occur- you're deluded to think some petty sentimentality will last.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

There are vampires here who aren't bothered by daylight. I'm not expecting things to remain exactly as they are, Kurotsuchi, and even if I wind up hating him, I'm not going to just give up on him.

Compassion and loyalty aren't things you've studied in depth, is it?

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

But you're not one of them, are you? Sunlight destroys you.

I don't understand you. What value are those things? It's pretension to think that you'll last. It's an insult-

[More sharply than intended; he shakes his head to clear it, but it doesn't work.]

None of us can understand that; don't pretend you're any different.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

I'm young. And hell, I'm a scientist, eh? I'm sure I can figure something out if I get tired of sleeping in coffins.

An insult?

[He stares at him a moment] What am I not supposed to understand that I'm pretending I do?

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

That you can manage living forever. That sympathy, or devotion, or whatever illusion you've deluded yourself into having will sustain you. That you can take on what Yuca's experienced like it's nothing-

You can't understand eternity.

[Somewhere, he knows he's being incoherent. Somewhere else he knows he's really criticizing himself.]

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

[And Horst just listens, because he's never claimed any such thing. In fact, the primary reason Horst promised Yuca that he'd live is because they're close to killing Yuca off. He doesn't understand eternity, no. He will never have to because they're working to kill him.

He knows who that rant was really directed at. But he gives Kurotsuchi a minute and pretends he missed it.]

I don't hope to. Perhaps in a few hundred years, or a few more thousand, it won't matter, will it? Yuca will be gone. And then so will I.

Why are you trying to take on what he's been through?

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

[Honesty, if only accidental. And Kurotsuchi's silent as he notices it, almost refuses to acknowledge it, but in the end, he just tries to make some attempt to answer the question.]

Contingency. There's no guarantee that anything either of us could do will kill him. That it can end.

What if the only option is learning it? And what if, after all that, there's still no chance?

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

Then my soul will probably be gone by then, and I'll be like all the other vampires. I won't mind living forever.

[Because the evidence all seems to point to that: eternity is meant for soulless creatures. It's the only way to survive all those years.

It's why Yuca's gone mad.]

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

You won't be yourself then either.

Though I can't imagine you'd be any worse company.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

Bitch.

[He gives Kurotsuchi a smirk.]

Too bad you won't be around to see it, eh?

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

[Just stares; snappish.]

Yes.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

[He shouldn't get so much satisfaction out of that. But he does.]

You never answered my question.

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

Remind me.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

You're invested in Yuca. You're trying to take on his pain--the same way I am. [That's an implication on its own.] Can you even say why?

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

[Not really capable of working out implications at this point, especially not when he's actively trying to figure out an answer. Eventually he shakes his head, but it's not refusal.]

I don't have words for that.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

[He just sighs. He has words, lots of them, but he can't give them to Kurotsuchi.

He rubs his eyes, dizzy and no longer enjoying this drinking binge.]

Try.

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

I am.

[Though the snapping's mostly reflex by now. He wasn't sure if he'd drunk too much or not enough. The shinigami was still struck by the absurdity of the conversation, of the moment- that it was actually important.

That didn't mean he had any clue what he was doing, what he was even trying to explain.]

Normally, he's easy to work with. I respect his intelligence, he doesn't usually annoy me. He doesn't complain about my methods.

[None of that seemed right.] He possesses misery.

[ahandsomedevil.livejournal.com]

Yes, he does. You like misery?

[law-of-reason.livejournal.com]

That would be a strange way to put it.